send me a ship and I’ll tell you who:
shops for groceries
Bulkhead. I could totally see Bulkhead getting a kick out of the little domesticities — so he’d do the household stuff like cooking, because it’s making something, not tearing it down.
HAHA PROBABLY JACKIE but they would both scream like little girls and call Ratchet just in case.
comes home drunk at 3am
BOTH OF THEM. they roll back and wake the neighbours, one of whom is probably Ratchet and Optimus’s lovenest and Ratchet bitches at them the next morning.
Although I think Bulk does the most of the cooking, I could totally see Jackie being breakfast bot, and it would be things like the energon equivalent of steak and eggs.
remembers to feed the fish
Bulkhead has a betta fish called Miko. Jackie put a tiny Starscream model he whittled out of rock into her tank and she beat the crap out of it.
decorates the apartment
Neither, but Bulkhead is a hummer.
falls asleep first
they are gross and always fall asleep within a few minutes of each-other, but I think Jackie would drop off first, most of the time.